Colleges to apply to: the absolute need to manage your expectations.

This is my word of advice for parents and students alike: There is no guarantee of admission until you get that letter of admission. So, quit your wishful thinking and overconfidence; have a reasonable list of colleges to apply to, and not put your hopes too high.

I get many eager parents telling me how great their children are, and they ask if I can replicate my past “success” with former students, like Mr XYZ who is currently at MIT or Miss ABC who is currently at JHU, since their children have very similar academic and extracurricular profiles as those past students of mine.

No, I’m sorry, I can’t. Because…your child seems similar in many ways, but your child is not the clone of the candidate who applied last year or the year before. Even if he/she has everything identical to XYZ or ABC who was admitted to your dream school last year, every year, the competition is different, what the college admissions are looking for may also be different.

So, it is absolutely important that one has a reasonably balanced list of colleges to apply to, i.e. with some “safety” schools that one would be happy with. No matter how excellent an applicant you think you are. No matter who you know from a few houses down the street, or from your school or whatever, last year, who got into X-college or Y-college.

My work is to help you increase your chances through advice with coursework, extracurriculars, the application process and essays; that’s all.

So, when I request that parents and students manage their expectations, I am not giving excuses prior to admission results nor am I putting your child’s hard work down. I am telling you that the world out there is big and you never know the competition you are up against in this year’s application pool. Your child may be among the top 5% of their class at their high school, but there are at least some 40,000 students who are also in the top 5% of their class at their respective high schools across the country.

I’m also telling you that there are many great colleges where you will get a great education and be prepared for your next stage of life after college; and the college you attend does not have to be that “dream” school with a single-digit acceptance rate. As with many things in life, we need to work our best for the best outcomes, but be prepared if our ideal outcome does not happen.

Good luck.